Episode 9: Gentleness: Kindled through Christ
The passages from todays episode are: Matthew 11:25-30 and Ephesians 4:1-3
As we near the end of our season in the Fruit of the Spirit, we're looking at the fruit of gentleness today - kindled by Christ, and something we're commanded to continue to grow in as we relate to those around us. Join us for our online Bible study as we look at Matthew 11 and Ephesians 4 today.
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Why is it striking that Jesus reveals his character in this way?
When do you struggle to believe that he is gentle towards you?
What does it look like for you to embody Christ's gentleness towards others this week?
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This episode is sponsored by Moody Publishers.
A Christian publisher, they aim to resource the church’s work of discipling all people, with titles spanning from Bible commentary and reference to spiritual and relational growth.
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The following is an uncorrected transcript generated by a transcription service. Before quoting in print, please check the corresponding audio for accuracy.
Felicity: You're listening to the Two Sisters and a Cup of Tea podcast, the Bible Study podcast for everyday life. We're here for a 20 minute burst of Bible chat over a cup of tea and an English style biscuit as we open up the Bible and drive it to our hearts. This season we're diving deep into the fruit of the spirit together. Whether you've been listening for a while or have just found us, we are so pleased you're here. We're grateful to be partnering with Moody Publishers this season. Last season we interviewed Glenna Marshall on the topic of her latest book, Memorising Scripture, and today we just want to take time to plug it again. If you haven't yet read it, Glenna provides wonderful encouragement to have a go at memorizing scripture, not as another thing to add to the spiritual do list, but as an essential component to fighting sin, delighting in Christ, and persevering in the faith. She includes lots of practical ideas and it's a book that we are both ongoingly benefiting from. Head to Moody Publishers to have a closer look.
Sarah: Welcome to Two Sisters and a Cup of Tea. My name is Sarah, I live in the UK. As ever, I'm with my sister Felicity who lives in the States and we're launching into gentleness today. I can't believe we're kind of nearing the end of our season in the Fruit of the Spirit. I don't know about you Felicity, but all of these are just starters of conversations, aren't they? There's so much that we could dwell on and this really is, as ever, just the beginning of a conversation. We're going to be spending our time in Matthew chapter 11 with some famous verses from Jesus.
Felicity: Yes, absolutely, definitely starters. Starters that are all the better with a cup of tea in hand. I've got an interesting flavour today actually. are recording this in the morning, it's not really biscuit time, but looked in my tea cupboard, if anyone's been following us on Instagram, I have quite a tea cupboard it turns out, and I found a tea called chocolate digestives. I vaguely embraced it and then moved on. Yeah, but this one's actually like, you know, it's kind of weird. That's a weird, our American list is digestives, our biscuits, so a sort of biscuit flavoured tea, but actually surprisingly good. I won't be grabbing it every day, but it's been pleasantly surprising. Yeah.
So Sarah, you have been not only digging into Fruit of the Spirit here on the podcast, you've also been doing it with your Women's Bible Study. How's that been going? What's it like doing it in that group context?
Sarah: Yeah, thank you. Yeah, I wasn't quite sure how it was going to play out because obviously this is different to what we usually do. yeah, so the way our women's Bible study is that we track with the podcast and we study the same things to help me in my prep time. It's been really good so far. I think as we were just been saying, the value of starting these conversations, the value of just getting going and talking about what it really practically looks like, but both to dwell on Jesus and to grow, to be more like him, to grow in holiness, I think it's just gold dust to have those kind of conversations because I think we kind of assume that we know what we're talking about a lot of the time and actually this is just, it just gets specific doesn't it? So that's been really valuable and just kind of for people to have time to tease through that tension of what does it look like both to be led by the Spirit and for the Lord to be doing that work in me, but also I'm called to walk by the Spirit and I'm called to persevere and pursue and train myself in godliness. So just opening those conversations I think has been really valuable. I hope the women in the groups would say the same. But yeah, I've been really enjoying it.
Felicity: And I guess a big part of what we've been talking about every time we've been in one of these Fruit of the Spirit, we've noticed how it is interpersonal, it's relational, isn't it? So the value of you doing it with your church family, like these are your everyday kind of folk, aren't they? And so that must be valuable.
Sarah: Absolutely, so crucial. Yeah, so crucial to have these kind of conversations where we're really thinking through what does this really look like on the ground? Yeah, really, really good. All right, well you're gonna read for us from Matthew chapter 11 verses 25 to 30.
Felicity: Okay, we go. At that time Jesus said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. 26 Yes, Father, for this is what you were pleased to do. 27 “All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him. 28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Sarah: Thank you, Felicity. What particularly strikes you as we get into this passage again for ourselves?
Felicity: Well. This is one of the only times when Jesus actually tells us, he very clearly declares what he is like. Most of the time we understand what he's like from the way that he's speaking or the way that he's acting. Whereas here we have a statement. I just love that the thing that he chooses to tell us, and this isn't just Jesus, this is the heart of God, isn't it? Is that he is gentle and humble in heart. Which I think just elevates gentleness. Wow it just rocketed to the top. Yeah what about you?
Sarah: Yeah. Yeah, totally. That that's the thing that he chooses to say first. That's the thing he chooses to describe himself. And the context is he's revealing what the father is like, isn't he? I think what just really strikes me as I read this again is actually kind of putting this in context as we kind of use our context tool to kind of look at the passage surrounding these verses because these are famous verses aren't they and there's been a fantastic book that's come out recently or in the last few years Gentle and Lowly by Dayna Ortland and one of our previous guests and I mean he's done such an amazing work hasn't he to unpack the heart of God through these verses and but as we kind of consider the context above these verses. We've got unrepentant towns who refusing to acknowledge who Jesus is. So they have a real kind of hardness of heart. And then below, coming after these verses, we've got the Pharisees and the leaders who kind of are plotting in chapter 12, verse 14, they plot how they might kill Jesus. So there's a real hostility and hardness surrounding these verses. And yet in the middle we have this beautiful response, don't we, that he is gentle and that is how he's choosing to respond to the hardness and hostility. And I love actually, I've been really, really struck by the fact that Matthew then takes us in chapter 12 again, he then takes us to Isaiah and the kind of chosen servant. Can I just read out a few of these verses? Because I just think it's really, really helpful to see the I am gentle verses in context. So Matthew takes us to Isaiah and he quotes this “Here is my servant whom I’ve chosen, the I love and in whom I delight, I will put my spirit on him and he’ll proclaim justice to the nations, he will not quarrel or cry out, no one will hear his voice in the streets, a bruised reed he will not break and a smouldering wick he will not snuff out until he’s brought justice through to victory. In his name the nations will put their hope.” Just that heartbeat of gentleness that has been expected through the Old Testament of the Lord's chosen servant and here he is and he's not crying out and he's not rallying against the hostility he's instead revealing himself to be the gentle and lowly one.
Felicity: So striking isn't it? And there's such a consistency there as to this is what God is like and I love that in this statement of gentleness that Jesus makes we basically have two invitations don't we? So come to me all you are wearing but I will give you rest. So that first, the idea that we would come to Jesus, that we would come to God, well if he's gentle, well okay, yes yes please I want to come to my gentle saviour and I think that's so that's maybe just quite different to what we might expect from the great Messiah who you know the people at the time were very much expecting him to bosh the Romans and just to kind of rule and all these kind of things but actually really helpful having that Isaiah quotation this is what God is like this is the heart of Christ and therefore I feel able to come to him because it's quite, you know, our shame, our sin, all the things get in the way and I really need him to be gentle and humble.
Sarah: And it's not just come to me and that's kind of it, but come to me and I'll give you what you need, isn't it? Come to me acknowledging your weariness, come to me acknowledging your burden, acknowledging your sin and your shame, and then I will give you rest. You will find rest for your souls as you come to me.' So it's not an empty invitation is it? It is full and rich and he is the one wholly able to do it. And I've been so struck just in my Bible read through the provision God makes for his people to be able to come to him, to be able to approach him. And then here we have God in the flesh literally just saying, come, come to me.
Felicity: Yeah, yeah, it's so, it just really works in our hearts doesn't it, in order to move us towards Christ. And then second we have this, then take my yoke upon you and learn from me, from my gentle and humble. And this is kind of moving into actually what we've been seeing all the way through our deep dive into the fruit of the Spirit, like come to me, says Jesus, and learn from me. And why wouldn't we want to learn from a gentle Saviour? In fact, learn of gentleness and humility. So the outworking of coming to Christ is that we ourselves would be gentle and lowley. There's a whole host of other things, but you can't skip over the fact that we are to be gentle like Christ is gentle.
Sarah: And I love that, I love that he shows us that we do need to learn, that of course we need to learn what it is to be like Him. And He gives us the means of doing that, doesn't He, by gazing at Him, beholding Him, which is what we've been seeking to do through the course of this season. I think, like I know you wholeheartedly agree on this, that the more that we're gazing at Jesus in the different fruit that He embodies, the more that it is so desirable to want to be like Him in that way. And I long to be gentle like he is. I long that people would want to come to me because I am gentle in heart. I long for that and I long for the Spirit to do that work in me but it does feel like a real battleground in my heart.
Felicity: And there's something in just the learning from him that is encouraging as well, isn't it? Because it is, this is something I pray for gentleness probably more than any other of the fruit of the Spirit, probably because I feel my acute lack of gentleness. But there's a real encouragement in Jesus saying, learn from me, because this is a work of the Spirit. And I think you were saying before we pressed record that it's not a personality trait. It's not just, know, it's not that we’re gentle or not gentle. The Lord himself is working in us by his spirit in order to make us more like Jesus, to help us learn from Christ. Shall I take us to Ephesians chapter four, where we have quite a direct instruction on this. So Paul's got his theological engine that's been happening all through chapters one through three. He's been telling us, this is who you are in Christ. And so then when we hit chapter four, verses one to three, we have a really clear description of what it is to be a Christian. “So as a prisoner for the Lord then I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle. Be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”
Sarah: It's so striking that, isn't it, that the first thing that he's saying, the first thing, the implications of being united to Christ, having the gospel, is that we're commanded to be gentle and humble, patient, bearing with one another. And again, as we've just been kind of teasing out that gentleness is in relation to others, that it's not just oh that person's quite a gentle character, that one's quite a brash character, like no, no, gentleness is in relation to other people and therefore we're to pursue it because it really impacts those around us.
Felicity: That is such a big factor really because it like it's relatively I sometimes think I am naturally gentle like when I'm just kind of on my own when they keep yeah
Sarah: It's so easy to be gentle like in the early hours of the morning isn't it? Like I'm gentle, I'm very gentle when it's just me and my Bible before anyone gets up.
Felicity: Yeah, yeah, like even yesterday I just had a day where it was pretty much just me, I was like, maybe I'm really growing in the fruit of the spirit. Actually, this is an entirely relational, like the way in which we see the fruit, like the evidence of the fruit is in the relational aspects of this, isn't it? So gentleness, and I love that in Ephesians we get this. Be completely humble and gentle and the next thing is be patient, like bearing with one another. The patience there is very much bearing with one another. Gentleness is something which is going to help us to bear with one another. And having humility in the middle there, something about that isn't there.
Sarah: For sure and I think humility is key isn't it? Well it's Jesus pairs them I am gentle and humble in heart and it's paired here again and there's something in that isn't there that actually if I if I view the Lord with right humility in how I view myself and I view others with right humility as everyone's made in the image of God. There's no hierarchy, there's higher or lower or anything. Actually, of course I then want to be gentle towards that person because they are precious, they are chosen, they are made in God's image and therefore they are worthy of my patience and my honour and my gentleness as I seek to love and serve them humbly and isn't it? So it comes back to that kind of Galatians phrase again and again. But it is praying for that work isn't it? And actually I think again as we've been seeing the whole way through, like this isn't a kind of world's view of gentleness, this is Christ's gentleness and so I need to keep remembering him, keep gazing at him and keep praying that he would bear his fruit in me and that I wouldn't just get kind of cosy or convenient with a world's view of gentleness instead.
Felicity: Well yeah I think that's helpful even just to draw our attention to that but in the world's view gentleness is often kind of corresponds to softness or just a bit weak maybe just a bit bit door-mat-ish you know that kind of thing but here there's a real resilience to gentleness there's a real decisiveness to it that we would choose to be gentle like Christ is gentle in order for well for the sake of others for the sake of our pursuit of Christ but for the sake of the relationships with those around us and that's actually a really quite feisty like weirdly feisty to be gentle in that way to decide to be gentle and the only yeah.
Sarah: Well, it's the self control plays into that, doesn't it? So actually the power of self control to, to prayerfully be gentle in that moment rather than expressing your anger, whatever it is, that's really powerful. And the gentle answer can turn away anger, can't it? Like it's, it's that kind of that, yeah, the power of this fruit, the power of gentleness, but it can only be that as I keep remembering that Jesus is gentle. And I think one of my issues is that I so often forget that he is gentle towards me. I so often think I can't come. I so often think that I just don't quite believe that he is this gentle and that he, know, that phrase in John, come to me and I will never, whoever comes to me, I will never drive them away. The more I believe that, the more I preach that truth to myself, the more that I'll long to be that gentle to others.
Felicity: Yeah and be gentle to others in the way that they would then want to come to me. I would love for you know my people, the people the Lord has put in front of me to feel that they could always come to me because I am gentle like Christ is gentle. That's so desirable isn't it? That's really something I want to pray for more and more and I think even just in our conversation the last few minutes we've noticed again that these fruits are all interconnected, they? That gentleness is so connected to peace, to love, to just all of these patience, all of these different aspects, and also connected to the eternal perspective of this, that as we seek to be gentle like Christ, as we seek to bear the fruit of peace and all these things, that we are walking in the way of Christ as we wait for that eternal.
Sarah: Yeah, and that character kind of witness is a powerful thing, isn't it? It's powerful with Jesus. You know, he's got kind of hostility for me, the side, hasn't he? But he chooses instead to kind of remark on his gentleness and to show his gentleness and action as a kind of powerful witness to the Lord and how he is and what it looks like ultimately to follow the way of Jesus. And I think that's just powerful, isn't it? And to remember that, and to remember that it is a beautiful thing to pursue this kind of gentleness. Prayerfully, of course, because without, as we've been saying the whole way through, apart from me, can do nothing, Jesus says. Do you want to pray?
Felicity: Well why don't I pray that this fruit really would be born in us? Father God, we praise you so much for Jesus' gentleness. Thank you that this is what he chooses to say about himself. And so as we behold him, we know that this is the character of God. And Lord, we want to be those who pursue gentleness. Please, Father, by your spirit, would you convince us again and again that we can come to Jesus gentle and lowly but that in that we would then be transformed into the likeness of Christ in this. Please Father, would we be those who are gentle, not just when we're on our own, but Lord, when we're in relationship with others, please would we be Christ-like in our gentleness. And we pray that this would be for your glory. Amen.
Sarah: Well, do remember that we have show note questions on our website, which are there to help you dig into these passages further with other sisters in Christ, whether that's in a group setting, whether that's on a one to one basis, whatever it is, we cannot recommend highly enough the value of getting these conversations going with others and letting others in as you think through these things. So we are praying for our listeners as you do that. We're thankful for you. And we look forward to the final episode of this season next Friday when we'll be delving into self-control. We'll see you then.
Felicity: See you then. This season is sponsored by Moody Publishers.
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